Everyone is off.

So when I send an email to various people I need to speak to I get a vacation message. So, with little actual work to do [1], I shall impart this tale about some of Britain's Dumbest Criminals.

( Seriously. And as a bonus the car park barrier is mentioned. )

In other news, all the fish are dead. A fungal infection, apparently.
[1]Apart from reading about Bio-Linux.